Half Life

Half life wastes before it goes

It’s funny how your bee sting touch never leaves me whole

It’s not enough to stay here almost trying

You keep your last laugh watch this dying

It’s just your half time vertigo

And if you want an answer, I don’t know

If you had completed me

Don’t think I’d be pleased with you

Don’t think I’d compete with you

With half of me to take

Half life nothing I’d call home

It’s lucky how these phantom limb bee stings never show

It’s not enough to leave this falling kindly

You burn my star down twice as brightly

It’s just your half light undertow

But if you need forgiveness, I don’t know

Half light breaks with nothing wrong

Just a corner of my bed where you don’t belong

It’s kind of you to notice no-one’s dying

You had your last laugh, almost crying

It’s just your half life, long to know

And if you need a reason, so it goes

—–

Low Five

It takes too much to please me

Attached with no real feeling

High fives and corporate anthems

Nothing comes to mind

Kitemarked for true low standards

Where more wants all and no less

Just change with no real progress

Nothing comes to mind

I want higher

Still nothing comes to mind

Give me a low five

Cause i can’t help myself

I’m a low five, downsize no-one else

Do you love yourself?

These altered states and egos

Potential less than zero

Found god in san diego

Nothing comes to mind

I half expect to find myself

In full control of nothing else

Lost hope but learned to hope less

Nothing comes to mind

I want higher

Still nothing comes to mind

—–

Lightning Field

Strike me down

Give me everything you’ve got

Strike me down;I’ll be everything i’m not

Count the questions on one hand you don’t ask me what i planned

Strike me down

Should have asked me what went wrong

Strike me down

Should have stayed away too long

Strike me down

Give it everything you’ve got

Chance me now

I’ll be everything i’m not

Hope’s the child of what luck brings

Points the faith in higher things

Ask me now

fire off everything at once

Strike me down

Take it anyway you want

Strike me down

Better left it all unknown

Strike me down

Should have left it all alone

Wash the questions off my hands;I’m the fate in no-one plans

Strike me down

Give it everything you’ve got

Strike me down

I’ll be everything i’m not

—–

Curl

Now your future’s got me told

Stopped breathing on my own

I curl to break consent

To print the facts in stone

Suppose for seconds you forget your past

Neglect to turn in, think straight, stand out last

I just curl now to help me find you out

We’re keeping devils down and sleeping sound

Now your newspeak’s ageing thin

A pale and hanging faith

A devil sick on sin

Will curl against its place

I just curl now to help me find you out

We’re keeping devils down and sleeping sound

Itch to scratch

To strike my past from all it’s owed

It’s sold

—–

Destroying Angel

I know you know my head’s not in this now

Nothing you can keep so keep me down

Like the stones beneath the water that you walk on to be taller

And the hands you stuck together cause you prayed you’d wait forever

Just another fragile angel heart

Falling down on lead wings torn apart

And the words beneath my skin

The ink that you put in

Destroying all the things you left around

Cause I’m earthbound coming down

Come down

Come down

Come round…

So what you have the nerve to call a friend

Is starved of all the sense to make amends

Cause I’m the glass you break to touch

But you never want me much

Like the view across the water from your shoes and two feet smaller

I know it doesn’t pay to be this hurt

Falling off the morning getting worse

And the words beneath my skin

The ink that you put in

Destroying all the things you’ve left around

Cause I’m earthbound coming down

Come down

Come down

Come round…

—–

Empathy

Her innocence above me

Today is dead, she’s around my head

Between my history, between my headphones

This is her home, forever her home

But i can’t be her brother

To empower her, to become her

To trawl through this forgiveness

My memory’s so

Empathy low

This attitude beneath her

It’s evident it denies us

Proves herself to be closer

But not me, forever not me

This sickness avoids all cure

Imperfection my downfall

Learn myself through symptoms

My memory’s so

Empathy low

—–

Superbug

I aim to bug you on your vacancy

Never complicate but you talk it cheap

You sense but you don’t know

Too lame to catch a cold

Slowly the signs will read you dumb

Surely the times will feel you numb

I know the pains you took to show me

And i’m nothing but your superbug for asking

I hate to bug you on your certainty

Never compromise – you’re just always weak

You care but you don’t show

Too proud to catch the flow

Under all the truth and facts there’s faith enough

If you can’t live on love alone it isn’t love

Slowly the signs will read you dumb

Surely the times will feel you numb

I know the depths you sunk to show me

I want the life the world still owes me

And i’m nothing but your superbug for asking

Answer – stamp me out

And i’d love to break your fall but no-ones asking me

Answer – stamp me out

Slowly the signs will read you dumb

Surely the times will feel you numb

I know the pains you took to show me

You said it hurts your head to know me

And i’m nothing but your superbug for asking

Answer – stamp me out

—–

Flowers and Silence

We’re always, too always in doubt

Works on me

She’s nowhere, she mainlines, helps me out

Now I can speak

Was heard, not seen, wasted, nothing’s free

Was black, was bruised, fucked up, twenty two

Was fucked up, twenty two

And I’m amazed, you eat, you sleep, you function at all

‘Cause my aim’s so weak that I’d fail to get into my arm

Was made the first to laugh

Tried but the tribute shortchanged kindness

Flowers and silence

Was made the first to laugh

Charmed but the weather broke me sober

I’ve never been colder

Seen braver, seemed braver since then

But never been

No favours, no saviours, no sense

It’s not in me

So nothing’s free, ghostdrunk, out of reach

So action this, cared less, never missed

And you preach, you teach, did I learn you nothing at all?

I’m too dumb to see but you stooped for someone this small

Was made the first to laugh

Tried but the tribute shortchanged kindness

Flowers and silence

Was made the first to laugh

Charmed but the weather broke me sober

I’ve never been colder

You’ll always be closing me down

Works on me

Denied me, remind me

I’m sold out

Just skin and teeth

Left black and bruised, fucked up, nothing new

Was heard not seen, wasted, nothing’s free

—–

Cute Sushi Lunches

Pretty raw with this

Cute sushi lunches

Nineteen steps from out under your feet

Can’t eat, won’t eat

Have, have not me

Can’t eat ,won’t eat

Cute sushi lunches

Pretty down on this

Cold feet excuses

One lame talk where art and life don’t meet

Can’t see, won’t see

Have, have not me

Hate like a child hates his hair cut

Can’t eat, won’t eat

Cute sushi lunches

—–

Ten to Twenty

Different ways of counting

Fingers running through your hair

Ten to twenty lifelines

If you doubt how this compares

There’s fear enough to share

A fear of loathing

So easy how you bare

The trace of me without you there

So fall like the snow

Too much, too slow

So fragile to say

Hanging over everyday

A breeze with contempt

To shame the others

A story’s so thin

To cover all your lovers

Count me out your standards

Shallow trade in competence

Ten to twenty answers

Shouting down on confidence

Too easy not to share

Too vain for secrets

There’s fear enough in there

A taste of need in someone’s care

—–

Splinter

I see you couldn’t catch your breath

Believe me it’s all that it must be

You see I never said my piece

If only you left it that easy

Fractured we have been since sometime sixteen

Failure was on me cause your ideals bore me

Does it take the fireworks to make you look in wonder?

Would you give reaction to the cause I’m under?

So coloured by you but your monkey messed it up

Surrendered by you,

Your monkey’s long-while had enough

You’re like scissors in my coat

You’re like splinters in my cup

I know you couldn’t care me less

Keep hoping it’s all only token

You know I never had my say

If only you’d kept it that open

Loser, I have been, but it’s so lost on me

Splintered I will be when your peace breaks cheap

Does it take the fireworks to make you look in wonder?

Would you give reaction to the cause I’m under?

Three colour blind you but your monkey messed it up

Surrendered by you,

Your monkey’s long-while had enough

You’re like scissors in my coat

You’re like splinters in my cup

—–

Wife by Two thousand

Never so complete, just failing on its feet

Choking out these last few days here

Never ever lied, all confidence at all times

Trying hard to love myself

I think that I need some working on so work on me

I think that nothing’s getting through so get to me

Just another no show, waste of passing go

Christ knows how we get to be here

No one’s broken no one’s beaten

I can see a rainbow near them

I can see a rainbow

Never so confused, just laughed out cost abused

Aiming loosely your direction

Always too extreme, all case and cause to plead

Striving hard to spite yourself

I think that I need some working on so work on me

I think that nothing’s getting through so get to me

Just another no name taken passing blame

Christ knows what we get to be here

Always coming clean all case and cause to bleed

Trying hard to like yourself

Never so complete, just falling on its feet

Choking out its last few breaths here

I think that I need some working on so work on me

I think that nothing’s getting through so get to me

Just another no show scissors paper stone

Christ knows what we get to be here